Refusal to be a Parent

The thing that really struck a nerve with me in Bastard out of Carolina by Dorothy Allision is how Anney refused to be a parent. She neglected and decided to choose a man over her child. As a future parent, I do not understand why she allows a man to tear her family apart. If I was Anney, I would’ve killed Daddy Glen and never thought twice about it. (This sounds very harsh, but I do not believe a woman should ever forgive a man, especially her husband, for sexually abusing her child). In actuality, before Anney met Daddy Glen, she was doing very well for herself. She was working and providing her children with the necessities in life. After she met and married Daddy Glen, everything went “downhill”. The interesting thing about the situation is that Daddy Glen never physically abuses Anney. Throughout the story, Daddy Glen posses many traits that an abuser might exhibit; for instance, many abusers try to abandon their partners away from their family. This is the first thing that Daddy Glen does when he marries Anney; he moves her away from her family. Also, I think this decision to move Anney and her children away from their family allows him more access to abuse Bone. If they would’ve stayed closer to Anney’s family, I truly doubt he would have abused Bone, as much. The second thing that Daddy Glen does that is relatable to an abusive person is his constant mood swings. Throughout the story, Daddy Glen has everyone afraid of his rage. Usually, an abusive person is aggressive, than his/her attitude turns into apologetic. Whenever Daddy Glen beats Bone, he then turns around and says he didn’t mean to do it; this is an example of his constant shifts in mood swings. Another thing that Daddy Glen does is manipulation. Daddy Glen is very good with this throughout the story. He manipulates Anney, but making her thinks that she needs to treat him like a man. Every time Daddy Glen loses a job, he makes it seem like it was not his fault that he got fired and Anney lets the situation slide. Whenever Daddy Glen kept losing his job, this should’ve been a sign to Anney that she did not need a man that could not support her family. Wasn’t that the reason, she married him in the first place? As I think about it, Anney really didn’t have any reasons to remain married to Daddy Glenn. He mistreated her family, did not support them, and constantly had excuses for his actions. To sum it up, I guess Anney stayed with Daddy Glenn because she did not have any self-respect for herself. She was needful and wanted someone who she thought was going to be a good person. In truth, he was the worst person she could’ve met.